On September 7, 2007 I was helping a man with a family issue at Social Security.  An hour after he left, flowers were delivered to me, thanking me for my help and signed "A friend."  An hour later, the man I had helped earlier was back in the office being helped by co-worker.  When he saw me, he asked if I received the flowers.  I smiled, said yes and thanked him.  (His name is Norman.)  The following workday (a Monday) I received a voice message from him requesting more information.  I called and answered his questions.  The next day I received a FedEx package from Hawaii, from Norman (he has lived there for the last twenty years.)  I received a box of chocolate covered Macadamia nuts, a box of Carmel covered Macadamia nuts, three cans of Macadamia nuts and a package of Chocolate Macadamia coffee grounds.  I thought Norman was being overly generous, but my co-workers insisted the guy liked me.  I told God Norman was going to have to be a lot more obvious because I have very little experience with men.  An hour later I was listening to the voice messages at work and I received one from Norman.  He said that he knew I had his cell number and wanted to know if I would give him my cell number so we could talk outside of work. Then, he said "I don't know if you have a husband or a boyfriend, but it would be really sad if you did."  Okay.... I got the message loud and clear!

That night I called him and we spoke for almost an hour.  Within a couple of days he told me he was returning to Oregon on October 11th to take care of his ailing father (he would have to return to Hawaii on December 19th.)  He said he would have to take his father's caretaker home and she lives in the La Grande area. He asked if I would go with him so I could keep him company on the journey home.  He said we would have to spend the night and he would get two motel rooms. I quickly said yes (DUMB).  After the phone call, I sent an email to Ann F. and told her everything.  Of course, she wrote back and said it wouldn't be a good idea to go with him and wanted me to find out if he is a Christian.

The following Sunday, at Ann's Open House, I received a call from Norman.  During this call I asked him about his beliefs.  He stated he was born in Korea and adopted when he was two years old by an American couple.  He was raised in Philomath Oregon and his family went to a United Methodist church and then a United Brethren church. He was president of his youth group and then when he was fifteen, his mother attempted suicide.  At this point, Norman turned his back on God, blaming Him for what happened (he admits now that it was not God's fault.) He told me he was married and had a son (about Bobby's age).  He divorced 20 years ago and never remarried. Sixteen years ago, he got a Japanese girl pregnant and they gave up the little girl for adoption. He told me has a difficult time with commitment. He has an adopted brother (also born in Korea.)   I finally told Norman I wasn't going to go to La Grande with him.  He was disappointed and asked why.  I told him that we did not know each other well enough to take that kind of trip.

I forgot to mention that we had already made plans for a date on October 20th - we would have dinner at Applebees. This had not changed.  Norman continued to call me, but only when I was at work.  I have spoken with him only once during a weekend, and twice during the evening (and only because I called him.)  Every day, he would call and tell me how wonderful I was.  He was so hyper during our conversations I could barely get a word in edgewise.  He asked me two more times if I would go to La Grande with him.  At times, my emotions were so intense that if I did not have a strong relationship with God, I would have said yes.  In fact, the last time he asked me to go with him, the thoughts in my head were "why not?" "what would it hurt?"  but my SPIRIT said NO WAY!  I listened to my spirit and gave him a firm no.

Norman made a surprise visit to my office on October 10th (he arrived earlier than planned).  The security officer let him in the employee section and told him where to find me.  I was standing at the copier when I heard a man's voice say "Hi Alice!"  When I looked up, Norman was standing there and he looked like a little kid in a candy store who just found his favorite candy.  Then, Norman put a fresh Hawaiian lei on my neck - I have never smelled anything more beautiful!  We hugged and then he kissed me on my cheek and said he had to get to his father's place (he had come straight from the airport.)

The next day, he brought me lunch and we ate in the breakroom where I work.  We had a nice visit, but we could not have a real conversation in thirty minutes with co-workers hanging around.  On Friday, he called and asked if he could bring me lunch again.  I did not like him spending money on me, so I told him I was fasting.  He joined me for lunch, anyway and brought me another box of Chocolate covered Macadamia nuts and a magnet that said he wanted me to smile whenever I looked at it because he thinks I am wonderful, beautiful and very special to him.  Again with the emotions!  As he was leaving, I gave him a hug and this time, sparks flew!  I walked him to the door and he asked me to come to him. I thought he was going to hug me again, but instead, he quickly kissed me on the lips.  I turned red and he left. 

I had a difficult time thinking straight the rest of the day and during the weekend.  I struggled with my beliefs.  I heard the taunting of the Enemy telling me that I was going to choose a man over God again... and Satan was gleeful!  I wondered if Satan was correct.  I quickly turned to God and asked, "God, help me! I cannot do this on my own.  These feelings are almost overwhelming and I cannot think straight."  God gave me relief IMMEDIATELY.  Once again, my feet were firmly planted on the ground and I could think with my mind and not my emotions.

On Sunday, I was questioning my faith again and thinking I might as well take what I can get from a relationship with Norman.  Pastor Don had just quoted a scripture, but I missed where in Hebrews it was located.  I opened the book of Hebrews and began scanning the verses until I was stopped at chapter six.   The title of this chapter was "The peril of falling away."  I continued reading.  It says that it is impossible for someone who has been enlightened and turned away from the truth to return to repentance.  It also says that this person crucifies Jesus Christ for him/herself and brings open shame to Him.  I immediately remembered how faithful God has been in my life and how I would not be alive if it were not for him.... and my heart broke for Him.  I could NEVER choose a man over God.  I would rather spend my life as a single woman and have an intimate relationship with God than have a relationship with a man without God. I recommitted my life to God and to His purposes, and I feel FREE!

I have been wanting to have a conversation with Norman to tell him about my commitment to God and to tell him I am looking for a husband who loves God and is actively pursuing Him and serving Him.  I want to tell him that he cannot kiss me, hold my hand or hug me again.... that these are activities I am reserving for my future husband.  However, Norman never calls me on the weekends or in the evenings, and when I try to call him during those times, he is not available.  On Wednesday, October 17th, I told God I really did not want to go on the scheduled date with Norman.  The next night, Norman called and told me needed to reschedule our date.  He wanted to know if we could go out on October 27th.  I told him I would have to get back with him about that (I could not talk then because I had company.)  When I hung up I was relieved and so thrilled that God answered my request!  I decided then and there that if Norman wanted to talk with me, he was going to have to do it when I was not at work.  I turned off my cell at work.  Each day, when I got off work this week, I retrieved a message from Norman at about 5:30pm.  He kept asking to come and join me for lunch at work again.  When I returned his call, I got his voice mail.  Last night I told him that meeting for lunch was not going to work for me because I only have thirty minutes and I never know when I will be free to take lunch. I said that if he wants to call me, then he has to call during the evenings or the weekends.  I also invited him to come to church with me on Sunday for the Spaghetti feed so he could meet my friends and family.  He did not return my call for a week.  (I have a feeling that Norman is looking for a companion with fringe benefits and no commitment.  Well, he is not going to get it from me.